Happy Imbolc! We have made it through the darkest of the days and are moving slowly towards spring. Though it is not Imbolc yet, I thought it would be a good time to teach about this holiday for those of you that want to learn or prepare.
History of Imbolc
The Goddess Brigid
The celebration of Imbolc dates to the pre-Christian era in the British Isles. Based on a Celtic tradition, Imbolc was meant to mark the halfway point between winter solstice and the spring equinox in Neolithic Ireland and Scotland. It represents the return of the light, rebirth, and is often celebrated with cleansing fire. Imbolc is also the festival of Brigid; goddess of fertility, poetry, crafts and prophecy. Brigid was considered one of the most powerful Celtic gods, the daughter of The Dagda, the oldest god in the Celtic pantheon Tuatha du Danann.
Prior to Christianity, Imbolc was celebrated from the evening prior to February first to sunrise on February 2nd. Through the rise of Christianity, Brigid was adopted as St. Brigid- one of three Irish Patron Saints. Brigid (or Bridget) is the patron saint of nuns, newborns, midwives, dairy maids and cattle. As such, there is also a large amount of overlap between the pagan holiday Imbolc and the Christian holiday of Candlemas- also traditionally celebrated on the 1st of February celebrating purification and the return of the light.
Celebrating Imbolc
This is time to refresh and prepare for spring. It is time to celebrate the turning of the wheel and the return of the light. Celebrating Imbolc is easier than you think, and your intentions are everything. Here are a few ideas to help you connect with the spirit of Brigid this year:
You can either do this at home, quietly and alone if you prefer to reflect (a fireplace will do). Or if you have a fire pit, it is also the perfect time to invite friends over, host a bonfire and welcome in the new season together. Allow time to dream with your friends and discuss with those who are important to you what you are excited about in this coming season and what you wish to accomplish this year.
Refresh your alter:
Brigid’s cross
Focus on candles in red and white. Leave offerings of myrrh, cinnamon, and basil; or rosemary and lavender. Garnet and Amethyst are also traditional stone for an imbolc alter. Weave a brigid cross and leave it on your altar.
Spring clean your home:
Nesting time is over. Now is a great time to declutter, dust, and cleanse your space. This doesn’t just include jeejaws and unused clothing, but also the energies in your space. Take some time to deep clean your home, and your mind at the same time (I really like to reflect while I clean- I find it therapeutic). Donate the items you are getting rid of if you can to give them new life as well.
Make Dream Sachets:
We are going to teach more about these very shortly so check back this upcoming week! Dream Sachets in a nutshell are little packets or pillows of herbs, florals, and spices that you keep under your pillows to not only help you relax, but also induce sleep and inspire different types of dreams.
Start planning your spring planting.
Take a look at what will grow in your area at different times, what conditions those plants need, where in your yard to place them, and what you would like to be able to produce this year, though it is too early to plant.
Remember, Imbolc was a feast day. You can cook for yourself but especially if you are having guests over, host a potlock- share in the remains of your winter harvest. Traditional imbolc foods include bread, seed cakes, root vegetables, soups, & dairy; Hearty foods meant to see you through the end of your winter weeks. However, the meal matters less than the intentions behind it when you are gathering with friends. Keep an eye out for the Imbolc Recipes I will share this weekend!
Take a cleansing bath:
Imbolc is a celebration of purification. Take some time to relax, soak, reenergize. I don’t just say this because I’m a sucker for bath bombs. You would be amazed at what some quality ‘you time’ can do for your outlook on life. Remember: you can’t pour from an empty cup. If you haven’t seen our post on a floral milk bath ritual- check it out here.
Reminder:
However you choose to celebrate, focus on your intentions moving forward into this new season. Remember that now is not necessarily the time to grow, but to prepare for growth. Renew yourself, set your intentions, and set yourself up to make the most of the growing season before you.
Sustainability is one of those topics that seems to perpetually be at the forefront of the news. And it should be. Given the trajectory of the world and our modern disposable habits; we have some very real, very alarming problems on our hands. It is easy to get discouraged. There is so much information out in the world, and it seems to be changing every day regarding what is good and what is bad. In a lot of ways, it seems like sustainability is out of reach, or that many of the things that could make a huge impact in the world are beyond ‘the little guy’; the people like you and I want to help but are just one person.
So today, we are going to dial it in, and bring it a bit closer to home. There are massive, large-scale legislative, societal, and corporate changes that need to be made, BUT there are a number of physically actionable things that any one person can do every single day around the house to make an impact. Some of them might surprise you if you were raised like we were. Technology has changed since we were kids, and with new information comes new decisions.
We could give you a list of hundreds of things you could do around the house to be more sustainable; some more achievable than others. Instead, we will boil it down to 5 main categories:
Use fewer finite resources.
Think reusable instead of disposable.
Purchase with a conscience.
Work with your surroundings.
Use your community.
Most of what you commonly see in lists of how to be sustainable can be associated with these categories, so in our household, we try to remember them and constantly ask ourselves if our actions fit within them.
Use Fewer Finite Resources.
When we talk about using fewer finite resources, we are talking about water, electricity, gas, petroleum, (tree) paper products, etc. This is a fantastic place to start because, not only is it low cost… you will save money. Usually because these resources can run out, you have to pay more and more to use them. And any adult can tell you that utilities are EXPENSIVE now-a-days. A couple ideas to consider are:
Carpool or walk when you can to save using gas.
Consider keeping your thermostat range at an ambient temperature closer to the real temperature.
In older buildings, check weather stripping and window/door seals. It will make it easier to maintain your internal temp for cheaper, save electricity, AND there are even fixes available on the market for rentals.
Swap to LED lights and turn lights off when you leave a room. Electricity adds up and some lights actually put off heat.
Wash clothing in the cold setting and then line dry them when possible.
RUN THAT DISHWASHER! Remember that not all convenient appliances are unsustainable. As technology has continued to progress and sustainability movements have increased, many kitchen appliances can be more sustainable than people! Newer models of dishwashers, for example, use less water than the average hand washer.
Think Reusable Instead of Disposable.
So, this can mean a couple of things. It can be switching out consumables to reusable items that do not need to be replaced and repurchased as often such as:
Switching disposable, synthetic sponges that accumulate germs to reuseable dish cloths that can be washed. Alternatively, you can use all natural sponges or loofah’s grown from squash that can be composted.
Use reuseable bags at the store instead of plastic bags. It cuts down on waste, looks cuter, and they are less likely to rip.
Reduce kitchen plastics and single use packaging by using glass storage instead of plastic Tupperware’s, reusable snack bags instead of Ziplocs, and waxed fabric covers instead of saran wrap.
To some extent, everything will get worn out eventually so sometimes avoiding the disposable can also mean just investing in a higher quality item that will have more longevity. A good place to invest for this would be in your electrical products.
You should try to keep your keep electrical products for at least 7 years (Read more here) and starting off with a better quality item will reduce how often it needs to be replaced.
Another item to try extending the life on is your vehicle. Considering going electric is great to decrease gas use, but what many don’t consider is that constantly getting new vehicles creates additional, hard to dispose of waste.
You can also include recycling or upcycling in this category. Try to avoid throwing something in the trash as much as possible.
Learn to recycle CORRECTLY. By this I mean, actually look at what recycling is available in your area. Some towns have different capabilities such as different items they are equipped to recycle or different sorting needs. Additionally, you need to make sure that ONLY recyclables go in that bin… not your leftovers that were still in the recyclable to-go container.
Consider donating, selling, or altering old clothing instead of trashing it. And as an extension, shop vintage and thrift when possible. You will find the coolest fits for very reasonable costs.
Switch to all natural cleaning products as this means less harmful waste in the dumps.
Shop zero waste toiletries (like toothpaste tabs) to cut down on even more trash.
Stop using plastic toothbrushes when there are completely biodegradable alternatives.
Purchase With a Conscience.
There is a bit of overlap between this category and the last. Yes, this can mean in the broadest sense, thinking about buying something (like a vehicle) and thinking about the longevity of it or the long-term consequences of its construction. What we really mean though is think about the who, what, where, and how of your product. Is your food from a sustainable, local farmer or was it grown mono-crop style and then X amount of gas used to transport it across the country to you? If it is sea food, how is it harvested? Is the farm known for using anything particularly harmful or, and I hate to bring politics into this, do they support some movement or practice you really think shouldn’t be allowed? Every purchase is a vote; for who you wish to succeed, what legislations has backing, what becomes mainstream, etc. Here are a few ideas to get you started:
Buy your produce from permaculture farms and farmers markets, whenever possible. It will be fresher, local produce so your food will taste better, less gas will be used in transport, and you are supporting your local economy instead of some far away big wig.
Switch to seasonal produce. Out of season produce needs additional resources in an artificial setting to produce… produce. *Ba-Dum-Tss* It is more expensive because they need to waste additional resources to create it. Save money and resources by avoiding off season avocados.
Pay attention to where your beef comes from. This is accurate of any meat or produce but let’s use beef as an example. Avoid huge feed lots. They are very harmful to the flora, fauna, waterways, etc, produce huge amounts of methane gas, and often contaminate the surrounding areas.
Work With Your Surroundings.
What we mean by working with your surroundings is to try to give back to it. Up until now, our categories have been about how to minimize how we damage the ecosystem… take less, pollute less, waste less, etc. Now I want you to think about how you can contribute positives. Things like:
Composting! We have talked about this a bit in the past, but composting can even be done in apartment settings. It decreases what is going in your trash, effectively contributes much needed nutrients back into the soil and depending on your process can actually save you money on things like fertilizers or chicken feed if you choose to feed them scraps.
Using a rain barrel for your gardening will help you not use processed water in your yard and cuts down on your water bill. A lot of rainwater is wasted and ends up in drains when it can’t get through roads, sidewalks, buildings etc. Instead, saving it and using it to water plants or your yard means it will end up back in your local aquifer as well.
Skipping the pesticides and instead looking for more natural alternatives, like companion planting, will allow beneficial local insects like bees, etc. to flourish.
Planting a native sanctuary garden or zero-scaping allows you to support local wildlife, cut down on supplemental watering, prevents the spread of invasive/ nonnative species, and can still look fantastic/be aesthetically pleasing.
Use Your Community.
Find your community and use them. We do not mean pull a “Mean Girls” and manipulate them. What we do mean is that you should find a community and utilize the tools that they offer. People who maximize their sustainability do it because they care about making a positive difference. They WANT to share that passion and help others do the same. Finding sustainable options and making good decisions can sometimes be tough. The good news is that there are communities of people passionate about sustainability who are trying to make it a more accessible option. They aren’t trying to milk it for money. Instead, they just want to educate and change the world. Think about:
Looking into food waste boxes like Misfits Market and Imperfect Foods… they sell boxes of discounted produce that isn’t pretty enough to sell in the grocery stores. It is totally perfect and would otherwise be wasted because it doesn’t meet a visual standard. This also helps you try new seasonal produce as well.
Joining a co-op or collaborative like Grove… this is a great way to find products that align with your morals. Grove for example is a subscription for affordable, natural, sustainable home and self-care products. In many cases, their alternatives as cheaper than what we can find at the grocery store and they have a huge variety of products from natural sponges to bamboo paper products (good quality toilet paper and paper towels), to individual toothpaste tablets.
That is a very simplified version of things but hopefully it will help jumpstart your brain and give you some points to think about when trying to live more sustainably. And remember that this doesn’t need to be a large overhaul of your life all at once. Just remember the 5 areas we discussed when you make your next decision. When you are choosing between products or actions, just make one choice different at first and you will find that the rest just gradually follows.
Hello Adventurer! Nice to see you back in the Guild Hall! Are you ready for our next lesson? Now that we’ve talked about world building, and we’ve discussed the benefits of D&D, as well as gone over some of our favorite beginners’ tools– it’s time to talk characters. Specifically: How to build a playable D&D Character.
Anybody can slap together a race, class, and some basic stats and run with it. But that’s not the same thing as creating a playable D&D character with depth that is believable and fun for you to interact with. We’re talking about the kind of character that your DM falls in love with and therefore can’t kill. Well, they can still kill them, it’ll just be a lot harder for them to bring themselves to do it.
Resources that will help you Build a Playable D&D Character:
D&D players handbook: we talked about this in a previous post. You can read more about it here.
Ultimate RPG Character Backstory Guide: also on that list of resources for beginners’, this is where this book is really going to be your best friend.
You and your brain.
Building a Playable D&D Character
I won’t walk you through every single step in detail because you don’t need me for that. We’re talking Nitty Gritty 4 Dimensional Characters here, Backstory, personality, believability, the whole shebang. I’ll still cover the basics, because there are some things to consider. But for an in-depth look at the races, classes etc. you will want to refer to your D&D players handbook, or your DM if it’s a homebrew campaign and you maybe have some more race options you’d like to explore.
Select your Race:
This will be the foundation of your stats and your skill set. Refer to your D&D handbook. If you are selecting a home brew race you will need to work with your DM to reference believable/ reasonable stats/ race advantages etc.
Select your Class:
if you are playing 5E your base options are barbarian, bard, cleric, druid, fighter, monk, paladin, ranger, rogue, sorcerer, warlock, wizard, blood hunter. Refer to your D&D handbook for a breakdown of each.
Choose your alignment:
this is the beginning of believability in a playable D&D Character. Some races are inclined towards certain alignments (ie dwarves: lawful good, Tiefling: Chaotic neutral) that being said you still have flexibility SO LONG AS it can be explained or rationalized by your backstory. Think about the kind of character you want to build. This selection impacts your character’s morals and decision-making process.
Alignment is an X/Y axis scenario (X: lawful, chaotic, Neutral Y: Good, Evil, Neutral). Both Axis’ have a neutral component.
Lawful: The rules matter more to me than individuals. “The Law is hard but it is the Law.”
Good: Other People’s well-being matters more than own. “For the Greater Good.”
Chaotic: Individuals matter more to me than the rules. “You say rules, I say Guidelines.”
Evil: My own wellbeing is more important than rules or the general public. “I am my own Rule.”
Neutrals: My opinion of what is more important is on a case-by-case basis. “The Devil is in the details.”
Lawful Evil:
A lawful evil character is going to follow a strict moral code. It might be warped, sure. But they are going to follow the letter of the law just as much as a lawful good character. They’re just following their own law. Think Darth Vader or Lord Voldemort.
Lawful Good:
A lawful good character is going to follow the letter of the law for the greater good, regardless of what that means for themselves. You see this a lot with Paladin types. A good example is Captain America.
Lawful Neutral:
we do what we must. They are characterized by being bound to a code or set of rules. They may not agree with all of those rules, but they understand the necessity of following them for a functional society. The punisher is a good example of this.
Chaotic Good:
Chaotic Good characters are going to do what they believe to be right for an individual regardless of what the law says (think Robin Hood).
Chaotic Neutral:
A Chaotic Neutral Character is the essence of “I do what I want when I want as I see fit.” These characters do have moral codes and beliefs that they live by, but it is on a case-by-case basis and they take all the semantics into their account. Decisions are made at their discretion. Riddick is a great example of Chaotic Neutral.
Chaotic Evil:
In contrast, a chaotic evil character is going to say “Fuck the rules and fuck you.” The Joker.
Neutral Good:
Gandalf The Grey is a prime example of “Neutral good” in that he has a strong desire to do good and make the world a better place, but unlike a lawful good he is willing to compromise on societal correctness to do so (insert every instance in which he utilizes hobbits to achieve his long term goals), occasionally seen as unreliable but largely at the end of the day they are about balance and acknowledging that there are multiple sides to every situation and decisions are not a one size fits all.
True Neutral:
True Neutral is less common because it is harder to play than you might suspect and it’s easy to accidently slip into “Neutral Good” as the line is very fine- this is one of my favorites and I think this excerpt from Gamer’s Decide explains it best: “The True Neutral alignment represents a character who is neutral on all alignments, and does not feel strongly about good, evil, law, or chaos. They may act in their own self-interest, but they do not have a particular moral or ethical code that they follow. They may act to preserve balance or neutrality, but they are not necessarily committed to doing so.” Geralt of Rivia is an excellent example of true neutral.
An Additional tool for this is the Save the Cat Prompt on Page 16 of the RPG backstory builder.
Choose Your Background:
Here you will also want to refer to your player handbook for the basic categories. You can also chat with your DM for a homebrew to customize something that matches your character better. Remember that this is not your backstory- it’s your background. In the vaguest of terms think of it as the style of your upbringing: Urchin vs Noble vs Criminal vs Hermit etc. each one comes with its own set of proficiencies or perks.
Spend some time thinking about this, as this is what you will build your backstory off of (or if you’re like me you already have your backstory and you’re going to pick the background that fits with it the best and gives you the proficiencies you want or are looking for.) You can use the roll technique and use some personality traits from the handbook if you want or pull your own, but this is where your characters quirks start to develop.
Arm Yourself:
Spend some time thinking about how you want your character to be involved in combat. This is heavily affected by your race and class but I have seen some unconventional blends that have worked. Its all about believability. If you are a physical fighter instead of a spell caster etc. you may want to spend some extra time in chapter 5 of the Player’s handbook as it goes into detail about different types of weapons and may give you some ideas, or templates to pull unconventional weapons from.
Write a basic backstory:
You don’t have to be an award winning novelist. Or even a good writer. I urge people to try for a paragraph or so, but I also totally get if you have an idea in your head but you aren’t an avid writer. My husband uses bullet points for the ideas he has and the things that are important to him and doesn’t bother stringing them into paragraphs. He can talk to you about his character but isn’t going to write a story.
However your brain works- write down your origin story: Who are you? Where do you come from? Why are you adventuring? What is your purpose? Who raised you? If you were making a 30 second intro clip for your character’s video game- what’s the premise?
Let’s Get Gritty:
So you have your basic build. Now let’s take basic and build it 4 dimensional. Let’s give it personality, nuance, believability, and pizazz. Nobody plays D&D to be boring- that’s what real life is for. D&D operates in the realm of possibility. Have fun. Play with it. This is how we take the basics of stats and story, and add flesh and blood until we have a playable D&D Character.
Appearance:
maybe you thought this would go in the generic section, but I want you to go beyond how tall you are, what color you hair is, and what color you are based on your dragonborn heritage. Picture your character clearly in your head.
Mikaela’s OC Niamh “Dragonheart” Rumnaheim with Pipsqueak drawn by Chris Vernam
How has their lifestyle affected their physique? Calloused hands could just as easily be from a lifetime of baking bread as they can from hefting a sword. Is your profession or background reflected in your wardrobe or jewelry? Could someone guess what you do based on your appearance or gear? What’s the likelihood of someone guessing and getting wrong? Are the little splatters of pigment on your fingertips from ink or the toxins you lace your weapons with? Do you have freckles? Identifying tattoos? What is your body language like? Do you come across cocky? Mousy? Stuffy? Intelligent? Might your appearance intimidate others or impact how villagers view you? Do you face any biases because of your appearance?
Language:
A big portion of buidling a playable D&D character is developing parts of them that you can interact with and bring to life. How does your character speak? What’s their vocabulary like? Do they have any phrases or terms that they use regularly? This is a great way to add depth and believability to a character and make game play more fun.
A sorcerer is going to have a much different vocabulary than a soldier or a priest. Does their hometown impact their accent or their colloquialisms? Can other people tell where they are from based on their speech? Is there something that makes their vernacular unique? A fun little added tool you can use in addition to these questions is the idiom generator on page 14 of the RPG backstory guide.
Religion and Beliefs:
In addition to whatever your D&D ‘deity’ is, or two whom your character pays homage, spend some time thinking about what their beliefs are. Do they actively practice their religion or passively believe in something? How much does it affect their day to day life? Do they observe any strange or interesting holidays? A fun (though not all inclusive) prompt for holidays is on page 18 of the RPG character backstory.
Core lessons:
A good way to build out a playable D&D character is to think about all formative things your character has learned up until the start of the campaign. All real people have them. life events and lessons that have shaped how we view and interact with the world. These should be based on your characters traits and backstory but with more detail. Try for a minimum of 5. What events, choices, or traumas have they lived through that have shaped their character? An amazing set of 5 questions to help you with this is on page 26 of the RPG Character backstory Guide.
Party Preferences:
What kind of company do you keep? Obviously, you don’t get to pick what kind of characters your friends or party members choose to play, or what your DM evilly decides to do with that. BUT based on your backstory and character you should be able to describe who your character would like to adventure with, or if there is anybody your character would absolutely not do well with. It will affect how your character interacts with the other player characters as well as any NPC’s your DM cooks up.
Taylor’s OG Campaign Party
Think about it like this: if your backstory is written around the fact that your family was murdered by a war band of goblins and another party member happens to be half goblin… you might have some prejudices or some strained interactions to work through. It will also be a factor in how you interact (or should interact) with NPC’s. remember- you are not you, you are your character. An example of this concept can be found on page 28 of the RPG character backstory guide.
Add detail to your core stats:
Sure, a barbarian is strong, but go deeper. How are you strong compared to other barbarians? How did you come to be this way? Of course a rogue is high in dexterity (if they’re a good rogue) but how might someone else be able to tell you’re dexterous, what might hint at your master thief skills? There’s a fun exercise in the RPG character guide called “Across a crowded Tavern” on page 32 that will highlight some ideas for this.
What drives you forward:
when all seems lost and things aren’t going according to plan (and they won’t). what inner strength, power, ideal, or memory pushes you to keep going. What stops your character from tapping out even when 80% of them is ready too? Check out the exercise on page 45 of the RPG book for some examples.
Create a mental snapshot of home:
what did your childhood home look like and how might that environment have impacted who your character currently is? Were you raised in a city? A village? A tribe? In a metropolis or a forest? A cave dwelling civilization? Where did you call home? where did you usually sleep? Do you miss it? Where did people socialize? What did community interaction look like? What did people respect? Who was in charge? Check out page 47 of the backstory guide for more prompts.
Creeds, mottos, and ideals:
this is different than beliefs, lessons, or idioms- even though lessons and idioms typically have meaning or deeper wisdom in them. Not a slogan, or a catch phrase (although those are equally endearing in a character- we see you Naruto). It doesn’t even necessarily have to be something your character technically excels at but rather something they hold in high esteem, a trait they aspire to, or something they believe in outside of religion. These are statements of belief outside of deities. Examples might be:
Life is what we make it.
We have nothing if we don’t have our morals.
The only thing stronger than a man’s given word is his heart.
Power is the only guarantee of freedom
We always have a choice.
It’ll feel better when it quits hurting.
Valuable advice:
what is the best piece of advice your character has ever received? If they could pass on any one piece of advice what would it be? Similar to creeds and mottos, but distinct in that this is something they have learned, that they live by, and act on whenever possible. A belief they hold in the livable present. Examples might include:
When you get the chance to dance, dance.
The man is the head of the family, but the woman is the neck and she can turn the head any way she wants.
Tuck your chin, you’re going to get hurt, expect it and be ready.
This too shall pass
The friends who criticize your actions are the ones who really care about you. If they didn’t care they wouldn’t waste their breathe.
If you love something enough, and for long enough, the rest of the world will eventually have no choice but to accept it, regardless of its original perception of it.
All things worth having are worth working for.
You’re always going to be “too much” of something to someone, do not dim your light for anybody.
Fears, Flaws, and weaknesses:
nobody, or character for that matter, is perfect. Even superman has kryptonite. To make a character really fun to both play, but also interact with for your DM and party members come up with a short list of “shortcomings” or flaws. They could be major or minor, or something your character is actively working on improving, extra props if at least one of them is something that your other party members can leverage.
You snore terribly.
You’re a dwarf that can’t hold your ale- a complete lightweight, the family doesn’t talk about it.
You have a gambling problem
You are a terrible cook- like give someone food poisoning bad.
You are severely ADHD- this causes problems in combat, problems with your memory, and with everyone elses sleep schedule. You lose everything contstantly.
You have a soft spot for strays and are always trying to “adopt” the local critters. Even when your party can’t hide them, feed them, or otherwise deal.
You are terrified of the dark- dungeons, am I right?
You can’t swim
Terrible anemia
Petrified of zombies
Invasive thoughts with no filter. Your party does not appreciate you making your disturbing thoughts their newest fears.
You have a crippling fear of heights.
Consider your long-term goal:
I want to leave you with an idea for character development as you go forward to create. Remember that what you are building is the base of your character. The point of D&D is to play/tell a story. Characters develop during stories. What you are making is the origin story, the idea, and the potential. But remember that your character is going to interact with others, be subject to circumstance, and hopefully have the opportunity to grow. Don’t try and create a level 10 character with an “I saved the world” backstory. That’s what the story is about.
Mikaela’s OC Pipsqueak drawn by The Polite Pencil (Micheil Salmons)
But also, do not limit your character ideas to what your current stats are- your character is as fluid as its development is. Some gardeners become protectors in great stories. If the templates and basic things don’t seem like they are ticking all the right boxes, or that nothing quite describes the character you’d like to build…. Remember that multi-classing is a thing. The possibilities are endless depending on what choices you are willing to make. In much the same way as real life you can choose to learn multiple things to create your own field of study/ specialty. If you’d like to learn more about multi-classing, check out page 163 of the D&D Players handbook.
Now go out there, build an awesome character, and keep your eyes peeled for our next D&D post where Taylor will cover actual execution and playing of this awesome character you have created.
Hey Guild! Long time no talk! As you may have noticed, Mikaela has been doing most of the articles recently. This is partially because between the two of us… she is definitely the writer. But it is also because my life has been all over the place.
BUT I AM BACK BABY!!!! And I am ready to continue our Astrology 101 series today.
As I just said, it has been a minute so let’s have a quick recap.
Astrology is the study of the movements and relative positions of celestial bodies interpreted as having an influence on human affairs and the natural world.
Your Natal Chart is a map of where the different celestial bodies were in relation to YOU at the exact time and location of your birth. This is divided into 12 ‘pie’ pieces.
The Zodiac wheel is the outer wheel of your natal chart and moves based on the sun’s apparent yearly rotation about our Earth, along the ecliptic. You will see this rotating on the chart.
The wheel of Houses is the inner wheel and based on the Earth’s 24-hour rotation about its own axis. This is stationary on the natal chart.
Natal charts map the sky at your birth
The Outer Part of the Chart Containing the Zodiacs ROTATES Depending on Birth Data
Inner STATIONARY Chart Containing The 12 Houses and Representing the Earth- – Using Words Instead of Symbols for Beginner Ease
In the last installment of Astrology 101, we looked at the 12 houses in the inner wheel of the natal chart. I like to think of these (this is very simplified) as categories or areas of your life (be that internal or external) that different energies can be in. Now let’s look at the planets and other celestial bodies that are placed on the natal chart.
The celestial bodies that are mapped are indicators of certain energies, needs, and drives. I have seen in a couple places that they are described as activators so let’s address this distinction before I move onto different associations and meanings. In astrology we are observing the planets and the synchrony it causes in our lives. Individuals born under different celestial patterns tend to have certain personalities, physical traits, life paths, etc. By saying that celestial bodies are activators, it insinuates that a planet “makes” something happen. Mars isn’t talking to me and controlling my actions but it being in a certain part of my chart INDICATES that I may be prone to a certain trait or action. I read a fantastic parallel online that described it like a clock at the end of a 9-5 workday. When it hits 5pm, the clock does not force you to leave work, but you do usually stop at 5pm (unless you are a workaholic like me) by choice.
You may also notice that I keep saying celestial bodies instead of planets. This is for a couple of reasons. Without digging too deep at this point into Astronomy history, the discovery of planets (and the argument about which ones count as planets- I see you PLUTO), etc… here are a few reasons that I am referring to celestial bodies:
Astrology is geocentric (earth in the center) and when it was originally created, the sun and moon were included in the list of planets circling earth. They are not planets, but we leave them on the list of “planets” observed and they are still 2 of the most important/influential bodies on our chart.
Astrology also observes several asteroids/planetoids that have a body and a calculatable orbit.
Sun or Sol: “I am”
The sun represents who you are at your core, your personality, ego, your essence, and your conscious mind, and the male principle. It is also a giver of life so can represent your will to live or creative life force. This is usually a deep, unchanging part of you. This is you in the BROADEST sense like we discussed in the first Astrology post we did (What is Astrology? Where does one start?). When interpreting your natal chart, one of the suns best qualities is rulership and one of the worst is dictativeness.
Moon or Luna: “I feel”
The moon represents the unconscious (or subconscious), emotions, the feminine. It also directly affects all life but is receptive, reflective, and passive, the polar opposite of the sun. It is also associated with memory, habit patterns, personal paradigms, role models AND how these condition and affect you. If the sun is what is apparent to others on the outside, the moon is the part of you that YOU see. When interpreting your natal chart, one of the moon’s best qualities is adaptability and one of the worst is inconstancy.
Mercury: “I think”
Mercury is the planet of thinking, learning, intellect, and communication. It can be associated with different speech patterns, senses of humor, and how one intellectually interacts with or comprehends the world around them. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Mercury’s best qualities is expression and one of the worst is restlessness.
Venus: “I love”
I was trying to remember the childhood rhyme about girls going to Venus and all we could do was come up with a more adult version. “Boys go to Jupiter to get more stupider; Girls go to Venus to get more Penis.” Obviously, this is NOT the rhyme I was trying to remember from elementary school… BUT just like in our childhood rhymes, Venus is feminine and associated with love. It represents pleasure, beauty, romance, emotional attachments, marriages, harmony, and any other unions. When talking about beauty or pleasure, that can also be material pleasures like artistry. It is a very personal planet. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Venus’s best qualities is affection and one of the worst is pliancy.
Mars: “I act”
Mar’s is the opposite of Venus (see a pattern yet?). It is masculine and associated with conflict, aggression, and war rather than feminine harmony. That sounds pretty bad but there are some better associations out there like ambition, courage, vitality, action, desire, sex drive, and animal instinct. It can show how you pursue goals, stand up for yourself, attack or defend, and how you dissociate yourself from people or circumstances. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Mar’s best qualities is initiative and one of the worst is harshness.
Jupiter: “I grow”
Jupiter is all about plenty, expansion, knowledge (think philosophical vs mercury which is more factual), enthusiasm, abundance, luck, responsibility, exuberance, morality, charity, frankness, honesty, and the soul. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Jupiter’s best qualities is benevolence and one of the worst is conceit.
Saturn: “I achieve”
I find Saturn fascinating because of how it interacts with the other celestial bodies. It is associated with limits, restrictions, boundaries, safety, practicality, reality, seriousness, laws, and structures. These could all be interpreted as negative, but they are necessary and allow for more structured lives and a sort of balance. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Saturn’s best qualities is systems of organization and one of the worst is selfishness.
Uranus: “I evolve”
Uranus is a higher octave of Mercury. I read a description of Uranus that said its energy is like a bolt of lightning and I feel this is fairly accurate. It is about suddenness, revolution, change, shock, disruption, flashes of insight, revelation, creativity, invention, and innovation. It is destructive to patterns and limitations, so it helps destroy the old and bring in the new for growth. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Uranus’s best qualities is originality and one of the worst (debatable) is rebellion.
Neptune: “I dream”
Neptune is a higher octave of Venus. This feminine planet is associated with self-sacrifice, compassion, spirituality, devotion, beauty, the subconscious, illusions, fantasies, the magical or enchanting, and the primordial chaos before creation. Neptune is the planet associated with the quest for universal wisdom, but also for cloudiness, confusion, delusion, and unreality. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Neptune’s best qualities is Idealism and one of the worst is vagueness.
Pluto: “I empower”
Pluto is a higher octave of Mars. It can be about transforming repressed energies into a group energy to evolve society, or it is also associated with sex, obsessive desires, transformation, power, true upheaval, wealth, renewal, and rebirth. When interpreting your natal chart, one of Pluto’s best qualities is transformation and one of the worst is inversion.
I just want to say that these are BRIEF interpretations. I could (and will eventually) deep dive more into each “planet” and what zodiacs they rule, elemental associations, how to interpret them for each house or zodiac etc. In the meantime, if you do want more information, a good resource would be astrolibrarys’ page on planets in astrology.
Now I did say that this was about celestial bodies… not just planets. Asteroids, dwarf planets, etc. are used to further finesse your natal chart. There are more than 100 celestial bodies that can be mapped and have meanings ranging from your nurturing style to how self-indulgent you are to your fame. I just want to briefly mention a couple you may see in a standard online natal chart:
Chiron: Wisdom gained through self-inflicted wounds; this transforms your personal identity.
Ceres: Your style of nurturing AND how creative you are in giving/receiving.
Pallas Athene: Wisdom, problem solving, the balancing of polarities, and a connection to the world outside of self through cultural lines.
Vesta: Spirituality and your ability to focus or concentrate in an undivided manner.
Juno: Committed and loyal partnerships
Lilith: The shadow side of your personality… basically your inner bad bitch.
We are one step closer to interpreting your chart! We now have houses that tell us what celestial bodies can affect AND celestial bodies to do the affecting. But we still haven’t touched on the one thing that most uninitiated think Astrology is solely about… the Zodiacs. Before we go deeper into the chart and start looking at aspects or anything like an interpretation, we will be adding in the outer wheel of our natal chart. Keep an eye open for our next installment of Astrology 101!
Happy Tarot Tuesday! Let’s talk today about another simple ‘spread’ for self-reflection. I say ‘spread’ loosely this time, as this is technically a single card pull. Despite being small, it’s great for getting to know your deck and heavy on the introspective aspect- which I will always love. For this spread we will again be using the Dreams of Gaia Deck by Ravynn Phelan- but you can use any deck. Today we’re going to be talking about the “Guide Spread”.
The Guide
There is only one card to define in this go around, because well, it’s a single card draw as we’ve said. This card is meant to guide you, help you reflect on something that is prevalent in your life at this time, and can be used to help you reflect on your actions preemptively. Sometimes a guide card may only be relevant for a day. Maybe you happen to pull a card relevant to something that is a larger or more ongoing issue. On a rare occasion a card may need to keep you company for longer than a day.
Performing the Guide Spread
My regular recommendations for tarot apply here: give yourself ample time to complete it and find a quiet space where you can relax and focus. Keep a journal or notebook handy, as well as your guidebook. Find appropriate lighting and light a candle or incense if that helps you relax, same with music/background noise. The point is to intentionally relax and be present in your reflection.
Shuffle. There is no right or wrong way, just shuffle. Stop when it feels right, or your hands get tired. Whatever comes first. Whether you cut your deck or not is up to you.
Before you delve into meanings and reflection, spend some time looking at the artwork, just examining the card. How does its artwork make you feel without immediately knowing what it means?
Review the meaning of the card and take into account if it is upright or reversed/blocked. Reflect on how this may affect your day, if there is something happening that this could help/ hinder with? I find this a good tool to reflect on whatever quality the card is addressing and assess whether I think this is a strength of mine or maybe a weakness I need to pay attention to as I go about my day.
Take your time with this part of the process, as sometimes there are the immediate reactions and the secondary ones after you’ve had a few minutes to think and consider. Don’t judge your reflection as positive or negative. You are simply examining the prompt as it is.
Closing the Reading:
Take a few minutes to write about your experience. This is where we want to be thinking about how this makes us feel. Note that I do not say “where we judge the reading”. That’s not the point, you can feel positively, or negatively, or inspired, or melancholy- whatever it may be; without judging the answer. One is a sensation, the other is a statement. Be careful with this.
Keeping a journal will give you something to look back on, a way to notice trends, and a second round of reflection that is slightly different. Some people (like myself) process differently when we’re writing and the act of moving your hands to reflect things helps anchor the process into linear thoughts when your brain might otherwise be a basket of ferrets on espresso.
The point is that this is between you and yourself. Which means that honest reflection is not only encouraged, but necessary- especially if you can get out of the habit of judging yourself and just letting yourself feel what you feel without commenting on it.
Now you’re ready to go about your day with a reflection excersize done and your mind prepared to be present and take the day as it comes!
We’d love to hear about your experiences with intentional living and I hope you give this a shot.
Let’s talk about controlling your emotions, or rather the importance of it. Not everybody’s favorite topic, I know. A lot of us, especially I have found in social circles I overlap with, really dislike the word ‘control’. It brings up a lot of negative connotations. Many of us are looking for liberation, flexibility, freedom of expression, or just freedom. And ‘control’ pretty much sounds like the opposite of that.
Usually, we are looking for something because we don’t have it. If you’re looking for freedom, you probably feel oppressed. If you’re looking for flexibility, it’s most likely because you feel stifled or contained. By that same notion, if you don’t have control of your emotions, its likely that they have control of you.
Not controlling your emotions is the birthing ground for anxiety, stress, depression, pessimism and a victim mindset. I frequently find that people in my life that have chronic problems with negative self-talk or a generally negative outlook on life are sitting in the day-to-day quagmire of being steam-rolled by their emotions. It’s like trying to keep your head above water when the water line keeps getting higher.
What I don’t mean
When I stress the importance of controlling emotions, I do not in any way mean to shut down, ignore, or distance yourself from your emotions. I can’t think of anything more detrimental to your health or success than that. Your emotions act as a thermometer and warning system for your body and mind. They tell us a lot about our current state of being. Warning systems are meant to be listened to. However, there is a vast difference between heeding a warning system and allowing it to decide the course of action by which solutions are found.
Think of controlling your emotions like running a ship
Let’s say you’re the Titanic (depressing analogy, I know, but bear with me). You have a transcriber (your nervous system) that is taking in data and messages all day and converting them to electrical impulses that are transmitted around the ship (body) and to other nearby vessels (our social circle). Those messages are a constant mix of good, bad, happy, sad, congratulations, observations, warnings, reviews, feedback, you name it (stimuli for want of a better word). It’s the transcriber’s job to sift through all that data, pass on what needs to be passed on, disregard what’s not important, and process everything so it gets to the right place. Your emotions serve as the messaging system in which that data is conveyed, each one like a little memo to a different part of the ship.
The transcriber shouldn’t be labeling messages as good or bad. You wouldn’t want a secretary changing the subject lines of your emails, would you? Nor would you want a secretary holding on to messages for an undue amount of time and delaying important information either. Not when the information conveyed could be the difference between changing course correctly or sinking in the middle of the Atlantic.
Not learning to control your emotions essentially hands over the keys to the bridge to the guy translating morse code in the closet. He’s great at processing vast amounts of correspondence and information but he knows not the first thing about nautical charts, crow’s nests, or steam engines. He can get you the warnings, but he doesn’t have the experience to decide what to do with them.
Not to bore you with the ship analogy, but that’s what the captain is for. I mean you. Your brain. You have the ability to take those warnings, apply context and previous experiences, and make decisions that are based on rational thought as much as they are influenced by your emotions.
What controlling your emotions means:
When I’m talking about controlling your emotions, I specifically mean not allowing them to make your choices for you. This still requires you to acknowledge them and feel them. Perhaps more so than the average person. You can’t control something you’re not paying attention to.
We’ve all heard that person say “yeah, i’m just in my feelings”, “I’m letting this get to me.”, “I know I shouldn’t stew on this, but I can’t help it.” This is what we want to work on: Feeling our feelings without letting those feelings control our day. That’s where eventually the mindset changes will occur and freedom will follow.
Feeling your Feelings
Remember when I said that I didn’t mean shutting down or distancing yourself from your emotions? Let’s go back to that. The key to controlling your emotions is in making room for them. You have to allow yourself time to process them and make peace with what’s happening in your life. If you do not address your feelings, they fester and begin to bleed through into other areas of your life. Your job is not to judge your feelings, comment on your feelings necessarily, or ascribe positives or negatives to your feelings. Your job is to sit with them in the moment and allow yourself to actually feel them before we ever touch on the matter of figuring out what they are trying to tell us.
The warmth in your chest that is love. The Icy dagger that is sometimes fear. A trip drum in your chest might be anxiety and the hot flush and shaking hands might be anger. Don’t try to rush your body through the process of physically feeling them.
Your challenge
In future talks we’ll go through practices for analyzing emotions and figuring out what our emotions are trying to tell us, as well as tools (like mindfulness and meditation) for how to make space in our day to day lives to reflect on those emotions and what may have influenced them. But for now, your challenge (should you choose to accept it) is to practice acknowledging your feelings on a day to day basis without judging them or analyzing them. and to allow yourself a few moments to really sit in them when they happen.
It doesn’t have to be a big to do or routine- I get it, we’re all busy. This might mean a mental “okay, I’m angry” when you feel it. But there should be no shame in the mental acknowledgment of “I’m angry”. Even more important is to acknowledge the positive ones: “This is Joy” as we often highlight the negatives in our life but don’t hold equal space for the positives. Take a second to pay attention to what that emotion physically feels like in your body. Then you can go about your day. But learning to identify what an emotion feels like is the first step to emotional clarity and control that we’ll be working toward in future talks.
We’d love to hear about your experiences! Remember, you don’t have to be perfect and you’re not going to get it right overnight or all at once.
Happy New Years! Already 2023 is gone and we are entering a whole new cycle around the sun. I’m not usually much of a ‘New Year’s Resolution Girl’ because I feel like I spend a lot of time throughout the year setting myself new markers, milestones, and magnetic goals as I hit previous ones. I don’t wait for the New Year anymore because I hear my dad in my head saying, ‘no time like the present’.
But it hasn’t always been like this for me. I was, and sometimes still am the person that struggles with hitting goals because I struggle to make and keep routines. However, I’ve spent a lot of time over the last few years figuring out what works for me.
We all know the pattern: January first sees an upswing in ‘New Year, New Me’, and by February more than half of us have fallen off the bandwagon. I even went through several years of ‘I’m not even going to set a Resolution because I know I won’t keep it’. In honor of New Years, I want to talk about setting goals. More specifically setting Magnetic Goals. With consistency and work, every day can be New Year’s.
None of this is anything I came up with. I am no expert or guru. I don’t have a degree in psychology or credentials to back it. But I do have my own experiences, several years of trial, error, and frustration figuring out what works for me. As well as lots of books, workshops, counseling, and classes to pull from. I’m hoping I can save you from some of the same frustrations so that you can learn to set Magnetic Goals yourself. At the bottom of this article, you will find a list of some of those resources.
The problem with Setting Goals…
One of my biggest obstacles with ADHD is feeling easily overwhelmed, which leads to executive dysfunction and decision paralysis…that can make it very hard to meet goals. As a result, I spent a lot of time referring to myself as “A quitter” or “An Idea Hopper”. If you speak that over yourself often enough- it can really undermine your confidence over time. It becomes its own self-fulfilling prophecy.
Think about how magnets work. Have you ever tried to force together opposing sides of a set of magnets? When the Polarity is off, nothing you do will make them stay together. They will resist the second you let go, pushing against themselves with tension in the opposing direction. Unknowingly, a lot of people do this to themselves with goal setting. They create goals in situations and with lifestyles that are polarizing and doomed to not mesh.
But if you flip those exact same magnets around, you get an attraction so strong it acts as a sort of glue, You almost can’t keep them apart. This is what we want: Positive Tension. Magnetic Goals. It’s one thing to say it however, and quite another to figure out how to apply it.
Creating a ‘Magnetic Goals’ Environment
Creating reachable goals is all about curating an environment that is designed to make it as hard as possible to fail. That doesn’t mean setting the bar so low that it’s a tripping hazard in hell; because that’s not a goal. But it means setting yourself up as much as possible for attainable success. Its about creating tension, especially if you’re an ADHD’r like me. That tension is going to keep you engaged, which is crucial to meeting goals.
A roadmap to Magnetic Goals
Actionable steps:
The first step to setting magnetic goals is to break up bigger goals into actionable steps. By actionable steps I mean physical things you can do. We’re not listing out all the passive things outside our sphere of influence or how the stars need to align for something to happen. I was first introduced to this concept in my freshman year of college, but it didn’t hit home until I took an accountability class that was actually taught by my cousin, Angela Totman.
This is the biggest step I find I can take to curate success. It prevents the big picture from seeming like too much or too far away, thereby causing that pesky paralysis. In a way, it goes without saying. But I’m going to say it anyways: baby steps. Take whatever your goal is and break it down into the smallest steps possible. For me, not only is it much easier to “take the next step” than it is to contemplate climbing Everest. But also, each tiny achievement reinforces the bigger goal. Over time, that will help rewrite the personal narrative you have told yourself about your success for who knows how long.
The Risk of Losing Magnetism
When magnets get too far apart, what happens? They stop pulling towards each other, their gravitational influence ends, tension is lost, and they collapse. Your goals are exactly the same. If your bigger goal is miles and miles away from your current capacity now- it will seem so grand that it becomes separate from yourself. Because I could never do that! As a result, you don’t even try. Why would you if you’ve already written yourself off?
But if your goal is just a little bit outside of your current capacity, you can stretch yourself that little bit. All of a sudden- that’s worth trying for. There’s tension when something is just out of reach. And then you just have to do it again and again and again.
Be specific.
Uber specific. Let’s say your bigger goal is to buy a house. Your actionable steps might be get your credit score up, talk to a mortgage professional about what you’d need to qualify, save up for a down payment, and talk to a realtor.
That’s a great place to start: smaller chunks, physical things, sorted in order of urgency. But it’s not enough. There’s a lot of grey area left there for inaction. I don’t know about you, but if there’s a loophole, my brain will find it. Quantifying what each of these steps looks like is the only way to tell you when you’ve hit the next step. That was something Angie was big on: It had to be measurable. She called it getting in the weeds.
You need to define each of those actionable steps. Sometimes those steps require micro steps of their own- but this is how you build your road map. A better example of the previous list is: Get your credit score up 80 points by talking to a credit specialist and following their advice. Research mortgage companies to decide who you’d like to use and make an appointment for a consult; take action on any steps they give you. Set aside $100 from each paycheck into a savings account until you reach $______. Talk to a realtor about what you’re looking for in a home and what kind of loan you are looking at with the downpayment you have saved.
Set yourself deadlines for each step:
This kind of feeds into being specific but I have time blindness on a monumental scale, so to me this is worth noting separately. If you are not explicit with deadlines you will say “someday” forever. Instead try “I’m going to make an appointment with the credit specialist tomorrow”. “I am going to have my credit score up 80 points in 6 months by following the list of steps they gave me”. Be realistic, but specific. I work better under the pressure of a deadline and that deadline allows me to hover in the sweet spot of ‘baby steps’ meets ‘I can do anything under pressure’. That’s the ‘magnetic goals’ tension we want.
Create routines that support each step through habit stacking:
Routine is so HARD when you have ADHD. It’s boring, it’s not stimulating. There’s zero novelty in it and therefore no dopamine. If there’s no dopamine, there’s no productivity. I have struggled with this and the resulting dopamining my ENTIRE life. My need for structure combined with my utter inability to build lasting routines led for the longest time to deep feelings of anger and shame towards myself “what is so hard about this?”, “Why can’t I just do it?”, “What, am I stupid?”
Two books shattered my understanding of this. A combination of habit stacking behaviors and the compound effect gave me not only a better understanding of positive reinforcement in the brain, but also gave me the grace to allow myself to succeed a little at a time instead of feeling guilt that I couldn’t do it all at once. One percent better every day is momentous growth compared to no growth at all because you’ve paralyzed yourself with a lack of systems. I have both books listed in the resources below.
Surround yourself with supportive and like minded people:
This is crucial. We’re talking about creating environments of success, and the people you surround yourself with are central to that.
At least one person that is farther ahead in your goal than you are:
someone whose tail feathers you can grab onto to keep you engaged and retain that tension. Even better if you can get them to take you under their wing. If your goal is more niche- you might be limited to following them on social media but even better if you can find someone in your community. More or less, a mentor or close competition. If you’re really dedicated, find both.
An accountability buddy:
In some ways this sounds so silly, and it can be uncomfortable if you’re an introvert like me. Pick someone you’re comfortable being honest with, accountability doesn’t work if you’re sugar coating the truth. You want somebody that is supportive of your goal, will hold you accountable, but will also be encouraging when you mess up, otherwise the ‘accountability’ can be confidence undermining. If you don’t have someone like this in your life, this is where accountability coaching can be helpful because it teaches you to be better accountable to yourself.
A Supportive community:
you can only control your environment to a certain extent. You still have to go to work, you still have to interact with society, you can’t control what other people say or think. People are People, so you’re going to encounter negativity and disbelief. The bigger the goal, the more you’re going to get. One of the best things I learned from my time with World Wide Dream Builders is ‘the solution to pollution is dilution’.
The more positive, supportive people you have in your corner, the easier it is to dilute the negativity you can’t control and stay focused on your magnetic goals. This doesn’t mean tell everybody about your goal. In fact, it’s better if you don’t. Studies show that sharing goals too much or too early can trigger early dopamine reward, reducing your motivation to reach them. Pick a few select people to share with.
Resources for Magnetic Goals:
Angela Totman:
Angie has a 20 year career in financial education and entrepreneurship training. She is a speaker, writer, financial coach and systems and accountability expert. The co-author of Your Financial Mastery, a college level financial literacy curriculum. Angela is also a featured contributor in Think and Grow Rich for Women, written by international bestselling author, Sharon Lechter, in cooperation with the Napoleon Hill Foundation. She is the Founder of Hero Life Alliance and Vice President and COO at Pay your Family First. Angela has dedicated her career to empowering others through educational programs and practical application of tactical action steps to drive results.
Her accountability course really helped me break down some mental barriers and set the stage for future successes by understanding where I was shooting myself in the foot. She was the person that helped me understand the difference between ‘setting a goal’ and ‘creating Magnetic Goals’. She has one of the best Grit mentalities I’ve ever seen and the discipline to match it. And If you can’t tell- I trust her a lot. You can find more about her on LinkedIn, Facebook, or her website for the Hero Life Alliance.
Atomic Habits by James Clear:
one of two books that entirely shifted my understanding of how to build lasting habits and systems. This book is a wonderful read, though in some ways it was hard because there’s just so much truth in it. Atomic Habits taught me the principle of Habit Stacking that I referenced above. After reading it I felt like someone had been gatekeeping this information from me for my entire life. This is one of those books that made me question the education system and ‘why isn’t this taught in school?!’. I reread it regularly. If you want magnetic goals, this is where I’d start.
The Compound Effect Darren Hardy:
The other of two books that changed my perspective on creating habits and the power of consistency. There are so many useful apply-in-the-moment exercises, it really helped me put things into place and explained concepts in a way that made sense. You can purchase a copy of the book and find more tips and tricks on Darren Hardy’s Website.
Grit by Angela Duckworth:
This book is so fascinating, it was the first time I really reflected on my ability to believe in myself and trust my own word. This was when I stopped referring to myself as a quitter and started actively exercising my grit muscle, because it was the first time I’d ever heard it referred to as a muscle. Ms. Duckworth’s book was the first thing that ever described it in a way that made me understand that it was something I could cultivate even though I didn’t feel like I was born with it.
Goals by Zig Ziglar:
Zig Ziglar was a famous motivational speaker, and many of the mindset quotes you’ve probably seen me post on our Instagram are from him. He is the author of over 17 personal development and success books. You will find him referenced by a lot of other Grit Paragons in the modern world. While he passed in 2012 this book remains relevant and is a great source of positive input for your ‘dilution tank’. This book specifically covers some of the things I have found most useful in great detail.
The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey:
This book is amazing because I am a hands on, learn-by-doing person and this book is actually a guided journal. It really helps with the practical application of elevating magnetic goals effectiveness.
The Power of Discipline by Daniel Walter:
I picked up this book because ‘discipline’ is something I have always struggled with, even with things I really want to do or complete, the mental toughness portion has always been a struggle for me. This book reframed some of my misconceptions regarding willpower and discipline.
Go for Stupid by Steve Sims:
I had the opportunity to hear him speak at The Refiners Conference in 2021 and I have been hooked on his content since. A self-labeled ‘Creative Disruptor’ I have never seen someone in his field convey information quite the way he does. He is also the Author of ‘Bluefishing, the Art of Making Things Happen’. This man has made a living for himself by setting ridiculous goals and achieving them. My favorite line of his is ‘how far can I take this?’
Go for Stupid covers how to ignore what others think and how not to shrink your goals in response to negative feedback and ‘gotcha’ culture. This book is PACKED with truth bombs and useful tips. He’s also a very useful person to follow on social media. It may sound a little backwards since I’m talking about creating tension by using small steps to create magnetic goals, but that requires you to have a big enough vision to excite you to action. This is the book for that. you can find more about Steve Sims on his website.
Don’t Get Overwhelmed
I know this was a ton of information, but I truly hope this can become a guide to setting magnetic goals that you can refer to later. Don’t let yourself become overwhelmed by the resources either. Pick one at a time. It definitely takes time too. Learning doesn’t happen overnight and its something that I will probably have to practice for the rest of my life, I feel like its worth it for how much of my life it affects, and how its changed my relationship with myself.
Like I said, I am by no means an expert. Far From it. But the resources I have listed above are all from people who ARE experts. I really encourage you to lean into their knowledge because its been life changing for me. Trust me, If I can do it, so can you.
