Happy July Guild Members! Today is the perfect day to talk about one specific section of our business that is near and dear to my heart: sustainable weddings. Specifically, creating reusable and heirloom pieces for your wedding or event. I touched on this in our wedding sustainability post, but I chatted with a bride the other day and she brought it to my attention that not a lot of people understand what I mean right away.

So What Do I Mean?

One of the questions we get most often is “What do you ladies do?”. With everything RavenWerks does and offers, it can be a challenge to describe all our hopes and dreams in a few sentences. Partially because we cover a lot, partially because said hopes and dreams are BIG, and partially because we don’t yet have the brick-and-mortar space to be able to showcase everything in one place. What it really boils down to though is that we are in the business of sustainable service to people. That can be hard to define because people are unique, and our approach to each service or event is as unique as the people we serve.

Trying to reduce that down to any one part of the whole is a challenge, especially when we’re the kind of people that believe that what we’re really building is a community and a culture- not a business. Communities are complex and cover a lot of things: so do we.

One of the services we currently offer, will continue to offer as we develop our event venue is helping you design your wedding space. Part of how we do that is by working with couples to create things that can be used as part of your wedding day, but also serve a purpose afterwards. This can be as simple as being home decor you actually like but can also include functional home pieces. It is one of the things I love most about what we do. Sustainable Weddings and events are kind of our thing.

The “Throw Away” Problem: Why Sustainable Weddings Are Important

One great way to reduce the impact of hosting a wedding is to forgo single use culture. The number of friends I knew that had to do the “post-wedding purge” or dump run, genuinely blew my mind. The amount of décor for a wedding day vibe that gets thrown away a day later is just mind boggling. Thus, this part of our event services was born.

The “Heirloom Pieces” Solution

So how do you create an elevated, personalized, intentional setting without all the throw away? By making it truly personal. Make sure that the theme and décor are reflective of you and your partner. Select pieces that have functional longevity. Creating sustainable weddings just requires a bit more intentionality, but it can frequently save you money in addition to helping the planet.

We help couples choose, design, and create things that are functional later in life. This can either be for you and your partner or for your guests depending on your needs. If creativity is not your strong suit- this is where we come in. We talk to you about your theme or style, your budget, lifestyle and living space, and your goals. Then, we design pieces that elevate your wedding day décor with unmatched attention to detail and a focus on sustainability.

Do you want something that can be repurposed into something else? We do that. Maybe you want something that is immediately usable as home décor afterwards. We do that. Maybe you want something that you canpass down to your kids as a family heirloom? No need to pressure them to wear your gown. We do that. Whatever it is- you want it to reflect who you are as a couple. And you certainly want it to be memorable for your guests and look professional.

What does this look like?

If we can’t be involved in curating the sustainable wedding celebration of your dreams, or if you’re more of a DIY’er, we can still help. Below are some ideas of what this can look like so you can get your own creative juices flowing. Some of these require design and crafting, but a number of them just require an intentional vision and a little planning.

Custom Designed Heirloom Frames:

During the wedding, the frames were used for all signage and some photos. The couple later used them to hang their wedding photos around their house since they matched their style of decor.

Custom Heirloom Guest Book

Our couple wanted a guest book that would also be their wedding album. They wanted enough space left in it to become a scrapbook for all the things they would do together in life later. This ensured it didn’t just sit on a shelf somewhere and would instead be looked back on and updated regularly.

The guest book portion we scrapbooked with selected pictures of the couple and on-theme pieces so guests could sign around them. Then they had the remainder of the book to fill out with their lives as they move forward.

Custom Heirloom Lanterns

One of our favorites was an evening wedding in the woods. We designed a set of lanterns spilling with moss, ferns, and mushrooms with little LED candles. The bride’s maids carried these in lieu of flowers. it looked stunning in the ceremony and the bridesmaids got to keep them afterwards (it was a very tight-knit group of friends that all had very similar style).

Garden Centerpieces

One of our couples was really into gardening and they were having an outdoor garden party themed wedding. We sourced local handmade garden stakes shaped like mushrooms and butterflies as part of their centerpieces. The bride now has them in her garden at home. She also requested garden gnomes hidden around the venue that are now in her garden as well.

Thrifted Colored Carnival Glass Pieces

This couple was having a 70’s themed wedding and they wanted LOTS of color. The bride loved antiquing and owned a small collection of colored glass cups that they were using for the head table. We got to enjoy the challenge of finding more pieces exclusively from second hand stores. Pieces ranged from vases and candle holders to serving dishes and trivets. These were used for centerpieces and tableware that fit the couple’s home décor so they could use them afterwards.

Thrifted Period Furniture

One of my favorites was a bride that wanted antique style bridal portraits and a sitting space for her guests to take elegant and elevated photos. Very Edwardian style. We found an amazing settee at a thrift store and were able to design a “private photo area.” It reused a piece of furniture, and the couple now has a permanent piece of their wedding in their living room!

Collectible Cake Toppers

Forget the plastic “I do” word or the generic bride and groom statues. We love when couples request things they collect so they can save them forever. Everything from pez dispensers, pocket dragons, and smurfs, to precious moments statues and Disney collectibles. This is a great subtle way to show style and personality without having to necessarily commit to a full theme.

Dress trimmings

This sounds weird. But, almost all wedding gowns need to be altered to fit properly and that almost always involves a hem. Don’t throw your fabric away. Partner with a seamstress to have scrunchies or bows made so you can keep a usable piece of your dress even if you don’t keep your gown.

If you are a Washington local- especially in the Skagit Valley area, we highly recommend the team at The Town Seamstress. This is something Kristin and her team offer as part of their regular services.

Custom Shoes

There are a number of ways to do this, and it may sound out of place on a decor list. But working in bridal alterations, I learned some things. It shocked me the number of ladies that go out and buy “bridal shoes” that aren’t particularly comfortable, or close to their usualy style just to fit a perfect vibe the day of, and then never wear them again.

We have now helped two brides take plain elegant white/ ivory shoes and add a little pizzaz too them so that they showed some personality. My favorite pair was a set of white ballet flats that we embroidered little vines and wild flowers along the edges of.

Decorative Fabric Recycled Clothing

This was by far one of the most abstract and cool things we’ve ever had a couple request. They had fabric draped in trees with flower garlands and they didn’t want to throw away the fabric afterwards. We turned the fabric into a skirt and matching vest for the couple that they can wear whenever they want (they wanted to be able to wear them for anniversaries and we think this is just adorable).

Heriloom Guestbook Ornaments

We had a couple that really loved Christmas. They planned a winter wedding, and wanted to keep everything in natural woods and deep ever greens; as rustic and woody as possible (very Scandanavian/ Nordic style). Instead of a guestbook we placed little flat wooden ornaments at each place setting with the request that each guest sign one and write a little blessing or piece of advice for the couple. At the end of the night we collected them and now the bride and groom have fun looking at them every year when they put up their tree.

Silk Flower Chandeliers

While we prefer realy flowers 90% of the time, silk flowers have a time and a place when used correctly. We’ve had several brides request fake flowers for ceiling décor day of. This prevents all chances of wilting and falling apart, and they make great “chandeliers” as decor at home afterwards.

Custom Candle Centerpieces

You can go any direction or theme with these. We’ve both seen and done them many ways. White candles with flowers, colored candles, carved candles. tapers, pillars, a mix of both. When the day is done- blow them out, take them home, and burn through them slowly. I’ve even seen them used as party favors afterwards.

Quirky planters

The couple really loved house plants because they didn’t have a yard. Their venue was a ballroom with minimal décor and they didn’t want to have cut flowers that would wilt and need to be thrown away. We sourced a mix of thrifted planters from small businesses in their wedding colors and filled them with a variety of cat-safe houseplants (which was very important to them). These became centerpieces and décor around the ballroom, making for an unconventional but much more “alive” space than before; and the couple got to take their plants home at the end of the day.

Curated China

Have a micro wedding? One couple asked us to help them find a specific aesthetic of china for a tiny but luxurious evening dinner wedding so that they could keep the dishes and make that their nice set that they could eventually pass down to their children since neither of them had any family that they would inherit that kind of thing from. The phrase the couple used to describe what they were looking for was ‘old money mobster’, and honestly- it was kind of perfect.

Harry Potter themed hanging chandeliers/ mobiles.

One for each guest table hung from the ceiling. The couple wanted to match the theme of their wedding but have something they could hang in the children’s bedroom someday as they knew they wanted kids. It was important to them to design them to be more like fine-art as a way to elevate their wedding. No one could possibly ever call their day juvenile. This event was honestly a fantasy lovers gothic evening dream- not a party city vibe anywhere in site.

Crystalized book art

At the groom’s request, we crystalized a hardcover, thrifted copy of his favorite book, in borax; and then turned it into a centerpiece for the head table. He’d seen the idea on Pinterest and thought it looked really cool but didn’t have time to try and create one himself. He wanted to keep it as art for the shelf in his study after their wedding. This project always makes me smile because I felt a bit like I was creating real magic at the time- my inner alchemist had a blast.

The Point

The possibilities are endless, and these are just some of our favorite requests, ideas, and previous projects. The overarching important thing is how possible it is to create a memorable day and experience, while still minimizing the impact on the planet and reducing how much you throw away as a by-product of your celebration in a way that allows you to hold on to the magic of the day for a long time afterwards.

There is absolutely NOTHING wrong with creating a stunning, intentional, visually magical experience for your wedding day. You can have beautiful decor and add personal touches and little flourishes. We want you too. That’s what weddings are supposed to be: intentional, meaningful, personal, reflective of your relationship.

Designing sustainable weddings doesn’t mean you have to forgo all of the little extras and details. What’s important is to make sure that things aren’t done needlessly or wastefully, and doesn’t add to the “single use” problem. Go for things that have overlapping or adaptable uses, and things that you will cherish for the rest of your life, or at least the rest of the objects life if it’s something that can wear out.

Reach Out About Designing Sustainable Weddings

Have ideas or inquiries? Leave a comment, visit our services page, or us the “contact us” page to reach out! If you are trying to plan sustainable weddings nd are a washington resident we also always highly recommend looking into or working with a company like Emerald Hour to find other vendors that commit to eco-friendly practices.

All the best,

Mikaela

All real symbols have power: The rising sun, the peace sign, Harry Potter’s Lightening shaped scar, the ‘S’ on Superman’s Chest. But symbols only have power because people believe in them. Symbols have the power we give them. Let’s talk Sigils. We’ve discussed setting intentions and using manifestation as a tool for change already. Today I want to dive a little further. Sigils are a psychological tool that you can add to your belt to help manifest those positive changes.

History of Sigils

Sigils have been used for hundreds of years in a number of cultures and religions as marks of power. Symbols of everything from deities to prayers and promises. The word sigil derives from the Latin word segillum or ‘seal’ and etymologists also speculate connections to the Hebrew word segula meaning ‘action, talisman, word’.

The Ancient Egyptians used sigils for invoking deities and for protection. In medieval they were common in the science of Alchemy. Sigils are one of those topics that usually has people getting defensive or accusatory quickly and I have never understood why. ‘Sigils’ as a concept is a very broad term, and they are ubiquitous.  

Don’t believe me? Star of David: Sigil. The cross of Jesus Christ: Sigil. Yin and Yang: Sigil. Buddhist Om: Sigil. Hamsa: Sigil. Nazar: Sigil. Triquetra: Sigil. Astrological Sign: Sigil. Zodiac: Sigil. Rose Compass: Sigil. Sun Symbol: Sigil. Moon Symbol: Sigil. See where I’m going with this?

These symbols travel, evolve and are absorbed and adapted by cultures as they move. It’s a concept that has always fascinated me and probably part of the reason I was so obsessed with the Dan Brown ‘Davinci Code Books’ and Tom Hanks’ later portrayal of Professor Langdon as a kid.

Formal Modern Uses

In modern witchcraft sigils are used to focus energy and strengthen manifestations. Some Wiccan doctrines use the practice of turning people’s names into sigils for positive sympathetical magics (general protection and positive attraction). These can be highly specific phrases turned into images, or general big concepts you are trying to introduce to your life: Protection, Guidance, Focus, Manifestation, or Determination.

Psychology and Sigils

From a psychological standpoint think of it as a meeting of “The Mind attracts what it dwells upon” and “Seeing with your Mind’s Eye”. ‘Out of sight out of mind’ but in reverse. Rewiring your brain isn’t easy.  A lot of people struggle with positive affirmations; with our inner dialogue either being too loud or not loud enough. It’s very easy to get disconnected from it, or have it be drowned out by the constant flood of outside input.  

Sigils provide a visual reminder, a front-and-center image to keep at the forefront of your day-to-day existence. Which, if you are a visual person, or ADHD like me and struggle to keep specific thoughts in your head at any given second- is a priceless tool. Sigils provide a visual touchstone during the chaos of any given day to remind me about whatever my current manifestation or self-talk project is.

Nothing is inherently ‘powerful’ or ‘mystical’ about the concept of sigils. Symbols have power because we give them power. The idea behind the application of sigils is that it is a grounding point or a tool to help you focus on the manifestation at hand.

Creating and Using Sigils

Technically, you could choose any existing image or symbol as the touchstone for your manifestation. However, if it’s a symbol that already has a strong meaning attached to it- that can kind of defeat the purpose. Plus, you want it to be as specific to you as you can make it. You want the association of that symbol to be so strong in your own mind that it creates instant visual reinforcement every time you see it. It should also be highly specific to your current project. Unfortunately, using standard symbols makes this hard as almost all of them have some kind meaning attached to them already.

So how do we bypass this? We make our own symbol. Now if you’re an uber creator like my sister, Taylor, where ideas and pictures readily flow into your mind- this could be anything and probably sounds like a piece of cake. If you’re more like me, and you need some kind of inspiration, flow of concept, or launching pad this can sound really challenging.

The good news is: There are tools for that. A number of different systems exist for creating sigils and they are all different and range from simple and more runic to complex and highly abstract. An easy pinterest or google search will bring up a myriad of results and how-tos.

I prefer the straightforward method because I feel like life is complex and abstract enough without me mucking about too much.

Simply Put:

1. Write out your sentence, desire, or goal in Capital Letters. An example might be: SETTING HEALTHY BOUNDARIES.
2. Get rid of every repeating letter. The above example will leave you with: GLYBOUDR
3. Simplify the remaining letters into basic shapes.
4. Overlay those basic shapes into a single graphic.
5. Enclose the graphic in a basic geometric shape (circle, triangle, square, hexagon, or trapezoid, etc.) I am partial to circles because they are soft and warm, but sometimes a more masculine shape feels better for a particular concept etc. You do you.

Application:

Once all that is done, you now have a sigil. Now you take that image and you put it someplace you will see it all the time, or multiple places. Your car, your bathroom mirror, the door of your fridge, the wall of your cubicle, your wallet. You can draw it on a piece of paper, wood burn it onto something if you want to get more fancy, or take a picture of it and make it your phone screen. But every time you see that image you repeat your phrase and you repeat this action until the picture is synonymous with your phrase.

After a day or two of essentially Pavloving yourself with this concept or idea it takes on a bit of a life of its own. Instead of you seeing that graphic and making an effort to intentionally repeat your message to yourself as a reminder, the graphic does it for you and it goes from conscious effort to unconscious byproduct, subliminally reinforcing that thought every time you see it. It magnetizes itself into the forefront of your mind all on its own. Congratulations- you’ve given a symbol power. Maybe not to everyone, but for yourself. That’s impressive and the amazing thing is- it wasn’t even that hard.

Give it a try

Next time you feel like you’re struggling to manifest something or get truly intentional about a change in your life go ahead and give this a try. It really is just spicy psychology. If you’re an out of sight out of minder like me, then put it in sight in a way that isn’t just another ignored sticky note with a scribbled sentence on it crammed in with all the others. Make it unique, noticeable, and something that will catch your eye. I really hope it helps!

All the best,

Mikaela

Welcome back to RavenWerks Astrology 101!

As promised previously, we now have a bit more foundation established on what astrology is and at least identifying the major sections of the natal chart so now we are moving onto… drum roll… the 12 houses. If you haven’t seen our previous Astrology 101 posts as part of this series, you can check them out in our blog under the spirituality section OR click on the links at the bottom of this post.

So now I am going to have you direct your focus to the inner wheel of your natal chart. I will reshow the full visual I made below. If you remember from our last installment, there are 2 “wheels” to your natal chart.

1. The Zodiac wheel is the outer wheel and moves based on the sun’s apparent yearly rotation about our Earth, along the ecliptic. You will see this rotating on the chart.
2. The wheel of Houses is the inner wheel and based on the Earth’s 24-hour rotation about its own axis. This is stationary on the natal chart.

Where the 2 wheels meet or sit (and where planets are) are calculated by the time and location of your birth. If you remember from our last post, you can describe zodiac signs as being in a house AND you can describe celestial bodies as being in a house OR a zodiac. You can say Pisces is in the 12^th house or that Mars is in Pisces or that Mars is in the 12^th house and all three statements could be equally true all at the same time.

So here is where I could get into why mainstream horoscopes based on sun signs are a load of bull that makes a bunch of assumptions BUT that will lead to a very deep, dark rabbit hole so instead let’s focus on the symbolism of the houses.

So, a couple quick things before we break down each house individually. The 12 houses represent different parts of your life or fields of experience. It isn’t an element or an energy like a zodiac or a planet. It is where the energies can/will manifest. Next you will notice that they somewhat follow the path of a human’s development. Lastly, it is worth noting that the 1^st, 4^th, 7^th, and 9^th houses are called the “angular houses” because their cusps are on the 4 special angles mentioned in the last post (ascendant, I.C., descendant, and M.C.) and these houses will affect you more strongly.

What Are the Houses?

1^st House- Self

The first house is a big one! It is all aspects of your personality and how you interact with the world around you. This includes your self-identity, self-image, how we initiate, our personality (duh), self-awareness, and even some of our physical traits. Because the cusp is on the ascendant, the way the whole chart interacts with the outside world is determined strongly by this house. Without going too deep into every single zodiac sign’s relationship with this house, just know that depending on what zodiac sits on the ascendant/in this house, it is said that you can note certain personality and physical traits.

For Example: I am a Leo ascendant. Astrology often associates this with being good natured, ardent, generous, passionate, kind-hearted, high-strung, broad shouldered, large-boned, tall (I am not), thin waist, upright carriage, and having a prominent upper body. Now some of this is more accurate than other bits but you also have to remember that it is all connected and can be altered or influenced by the ruling planets that reside in this house (in my case Jupiter).  

2^nd House-Possessions and Personal Values

The second house has to do with what you value. This can mean money and possessions but also self-worth, self-esteem, and your personal values. The house and home are ruled by the 4^th house so things like your car, clothes and moveable property are not included. Instead, it is more about how you come across wealth/material possessions, your potential for accumulating them, how that is spent, and your attitude towards them. And to clarify, this is your own money.

3^rd House- Communication

This house has to do with all forms of communication and our immediate environment; siblings, neighbors, short journey’s, transportation, thinking patterns, early education (before college when we are developing our communication skills), messages, deliveries, gossip, phone calls, visits, reading, and writing.

4^th House- Home

On the surface level this house is associated with the home, family, land, personal foundations, and your roots. On a deeper level, its cusp is on the I.C. which is representative of all things below the surface of the earth. Because of this it has also been associated with the deeper center of our existence, the end of life and graves. Because it is the root of ourselves, it rules where you go when you die and also your origin. This house has an interesting connection to the concepts of karma, karmic baggage and reincarnation.

5^th House- Creativity

This house is about being yourself and enjoying it. It is about passion and matters of the heart (not to confused with marriage which is considered a separate thing/ a cooperative partnership because these weren’t always for love). This house can be associated with creativity, children, pleasure, personal interests, love affairs, sports, hobbies, speculation, risk taking, teaching, drama, creative self-expression, love given, gambling, romance, and sexual relationships.

6^th House- Service and Health

This house relates to your physical, mental, and emotional wellbeing as well as your life’s purpose. Some places it will list this house as having to do with work as well but I find ‘service’ to be more accurate. Work to me means something close to a career which is ruled by the 10^th house. Instead, this house is associated with your physical ability to work, quality of any job or task you perform, volunteer work etc.

7^th House- Marriage and Partnership

It was mentioned earlier that the 5^th house has more to do with love and passion. The 7^th house is the house of marriage, but it is most likely more accurate to call it the house of partnerships (specifically 1 on-1 partnerships) in more modern society. These relationships or partnerships could be marriage, business, contracts, or any cooperative relationship honestly. It also deals with the reverse of those such as divorce, separation, lawsuits, enemies, noncooperation etc. These tend to be different than relationships in the 5^th house because they are more permanent or binding,

8th House- Death and Regeneration and Sexuality and….

This is a fun house to talk about (and my favorite) just because it seems to be all over the place in regard to symbolism and is also very misunderstood. This house rules death, regeneration, taxes, inheritances, wills and legacies, sex (think mattress mambo rather than male/female), occult, joint resources, another’s money and possessions (rather than your own), bankruptcy, losses, personal sacrifice, alimony, and clairvoyance. THAT IS A LOOOOOOOT. You may notice a common thread with everything I just listed is that they have a lot of negative connotations. But really this house is about transformation, going through something negative and then becoming stronger through that struggle.

9^th House- Mental Exploration

I have seen this house listed as the house of philosophy. I think mental exploration encompasses more of its meaning though. It IS associated with philosophy, but it is also associated with religion, law, higher education, ethics, morals, travel, foreign interests, spiritual pursuits, dreams, visions, higher mind, ideas, understanding, wisdom, books, publishing, ceremonies, rituals, and pretty much any other thing you can thing of that has to do with thought. It is less about learning something (like memorizing it) and more about understanding things. It is us trying to find meaning of things and is much more about the abstract whereas the 3^rd house was more about concrete knowledge.

10^th House- Career and Public Life

This house symbolizes success and the gain of intangible “stuff”. It is associated with honor, status, community power, prestige, reputation, professional careers, recognition, personal achievements, social responsibilities, sense of duty, authority figures, and even politics.

11^th House- Hopes, Wishes, and Friends

The 11^th house has to do with the social structures we live in such as community, large groups, friends, social groups, associations, memberships, and humanitarian interests. It also has to do with hopes, goals, ambitions, wishes, liberty, and self-realization.

12^th House- Self-Undoing and Problems

Here is another house that has a bad reputation. There is a mental and physical aspect to this house but at its root, it is associated with problems, separation, our subconscious, and the hidden. If we look at this from the mental angle first it can be associated with the unconscious mind, subconscious memory, habit patterns from the past, mental illness, karmic debts, self-deception, escapism, spiritual realization, limitations, frustration, and self-undoing. A little more tangible, it is also associated with what separates us from normal life such as institutions (hospital, prison etc), confinement, secrets, hidden enemies, and self-sacrifice. I have also seen it associated with sorrow, tribulation, widowhood, grief, funerals, exile, seclusion, bribery, subversion, murder, suicide, kidnapping, and endings. Not going to lie- when typing this all out I can honestly say that I see why this might now be the most loved house.

So that is the (not so) long and short of it. Those are what the houses are associated with. I am not getting into interpreting the chart yet as we still need some more context before we can get there. Basically, what I just gave you is a list of WHAT the planets on your chart can affect. Next, we will start talking about HOW they can be affected. Rather than moving onto the outer wheel of Zodiacs we will talk about the different celestial bodies.

Until next time!

Taylor

CHECK OUT THE FULL ASTROLOGY 101 SERIES:

• What is Astrology? Where Does One Start?
• Astrology Symbol Reference Page
• Astrology 101: What Is In Your Natal Chart?
• Astrology 101: Natal Chart Organization and Terminology
• Astrology 101: The 12 houses & Their Symbolism
• Astrology 101: The Energy of Planets and Other Celestial Bodies

Do you feel like the world gets faster every day? Like no matter how quickly you move, or how you habit stack your day you’re just a little bit behind speed, rushing to catch up and get to the next thing on your to-do list? Do you frequently feel like, as happy as you may be, there’s always something right on the edge of your peripheral you’re missing, or missing out on? Do you struggle to stay grounded with all of the multitasking, multi-focusing that society expects everyone to maintain in modern society? 

ME TOO.

I’ve spent a lot of time feeling that way. Even if I enjoyed what I was currently doing or working on, part of my brain was always focused on whatever my next “thing” was. Next idea, next obligation, next appointment.  The constant mental dialogue and running “to-do” list in my head not only led me to be distracted all the time, but anxious and tired. I would miss important details in conversations, zone out, or when looking back on positive experiences, be mad that I couldn’t remember the details as much as I wanted to. 

I get over stimulated easily, and really struggle with anxiety; especially in loud spaces (I recently discovered Loop Earplugs- and they have become my best friends). If you knew me as a child this is 100% ‘a catch 22 meets irony’ moment. Focusing my attention without getting overwhelmed by the sheer volume of stuff (good stuff, bad stuff, exciting stuff, boring stuff, chores, ideas, music lyrics, internal monologue, anything and everything stuff) in my head is a frequent challenge. I struggle to feel grounded and mellow. I do not hold still well, never have (except for when I accidentally zone out standing in front of a bookshelf and don’t move for an hour and a half because I’m staring into space). 

If this is starting to sound a lot like a severe case of ADHD…. Well, surprise, surprise; turns out I do in fact suffer from ADHD. Who knew? BUT this isn’t an ADHD self- diagnoses post. In fact, if you suspect you may have ADHD I cannot urge you enough to seek out a medical expert and get tested instead of schlogging through hours of articles and tiktoks or instagram posts. While there’s nothing wrong with doing your own research, I think it is better to see a specialist.

I avoided getting tested because it seemed too complicated and quite frankly a little part of me was afraid of it. I was afraid of what it indicated, and what feedback I might get from certain people in my family. But that’s a discussion for another day. Having finally decided to get tested at the ripe old age of 27 and get not only an answer, but help for some of the aspects that have been causing me issues, I wish I had done so sooner. Not just for the sake of knowing, but because I am learning that there are so many things I could have made easier for myself sooner, and in some ways I was fighting a battle with myself that I didn’t need too. I’ve been able to out hack my brain in certain areas as a result of learning more about the actual science behind ADHD and what it means in my day to day life. 

And while I am still learning, and still have things I need to work on (like time blindness), I have a better understanding of HOW to set myself up for success and how to help me get what I need. I also have more patience for myself and I’m learning to have a certain amount of grace with myself. It’s taken stress off of me, and by extension, my family. 

Which brings me to my real point. I reencountered something that I have on some level been aware of for most of my young and adult life but never really used or practiced. Now, at a much different point in my life, its been retaught to me and am learning to use as a tool when I get overstimulated, when I panic, when everything is just going too fast. It’s not specific to ADHD. Anybody can practice it and use it. Honestly, I think everybody should. The positive side effects are endless, and the process itself is relaxing. Its been an absolute game changer both mentally and emotionally; but also physically and spiritually. 

I WANT TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT THE ART OF MINDFULNESS AND MEDITATION.

Sounds fancy. Sounds New Wave. Sounds like the kind of thing practiced by hippies in the 70’s or gate-kept by rich tech moguls with an excess of time on their hands. Or at least, that’s how I felt every time the head sensei of my dojo or my yoga teacher talked about it when I was a kid. It was ‘hippie woowoo’ and way over my head. 

I didn’t have the patience or the attention span for it, and at 11 I couldn’t fathom how on earth thinking about how learning to let go of your thoughts could make you feel present in the moment, or how “letting them go” could really calm my mind or my body. I couldn’t even figure out what ‘letting the thoughts go’ really meant. 

11 year old me was like “If I could do that, I would, trust me. I can’t just turn my brain off” 

Young adult me also tried to dabble in meditation for a brief period of time around the age of 22 at a Tibetan Cultural Center in Phoenix, Arizona. I had slightly better success, but not by much. At that point, I was more receptive to the idea and I was fascinated by the concept, but I could just never get the practice to stick. Partially because habit forming is really hard when you have ADHD it turns out, but mostly because part of the meditation practices I was attending went through a process of acknowledging the body and its sensations as part of the opening. They did this through a process of focusing your attention to each area in turn and really turning your attention to how your body feels. This was at a time when I was really struggling with getting my Fibro Myalgia under control. I had a particular ongoing problem with my legs and I had spent a lot of time trying to teach myself to IGNORE my body and the sensations attached to it to try and keep myself calm, and that part of the process was acutely uncomfortable for me bordering on panic inducing. So I didn’t stick with it. I wish I had. 

FAST FORWARD

I’m about a year into practicing now. And I’ll tell you why it has become one of the biggest tools in my belt. (It EVEN helps me overcome the nerve pain sensations I was struggling so hard to ignore). 

You can do it anywhere. At home. In your cubicle at your desk. In your car at lunch. In the bathroom hiding from your kids. In your kitchen while you cook. Practicing mindfulness and meditation does not mean sitting cross-legged for hours in a dim room in silence. You can if you choose to, but it’s not like you’ve either reached a buddha state of enlightenment or you haven’t. Meditation is a constant practice, and you can practice it to whatever degree is useful to you. It’s not a destination or something you can achieve, but instead you can pull out of your back pocket whenever and use as much as you need to. 

Once you understand the principle of it, anything can be meditative. I do enjoy sitting meditations, but there’s also walking meditations, laying meditations, and interactive meditations. 

What feels like the biggest secret ever kept to me is what mindfulness and mediation actually is. Its not some big fancy right or wrong process full of mojo and specific processes. Stated simply, Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of one’s thoughts, feelings, sensations, and environment in the present moment, without judging or evaluating them.  

Meditation is a tool used to practice mindfulness. It is taking a second to breathe, to center yourself, to observe your surroundings. To acknowledge when you feel overstimulated, or anxious, or tired, or even happy. Mindfulness is the practice of allowing yourself to feel whatever it is that you feel in the present moment and acknowledge the emotion or feeling for what it is without feeling guilty or angry. Sometimes half the emotional spiral is how you feel about your feelings. Mindfulness helps to work through that. It helps create the tiny bit of a barrier that I sometimes need to work through something. It removes me from the feeling just enough to allow me to examine it calmly, and in the privacy of my own thoughts. In some ways, its more about being intentional with your thoughts and actions than being some uber calm zen guru. 

It costs you nothing to practice. And it does take practice. 5 minutes here. 2 minutes there. 45 seconds here. 10 minutes. 20 minutes. The more you practice, the easier it gets. 

I started with focused meditation. I set aside 5 minutes a day to reflect and to go through the process of meditating. It was awkward and I was bad at it and it felt weird. It did. But the more I did it, not only did I get better at it and start seeing the benefits of it but I also began to see different ways I can do it. 

Overwhelmed making dinner because your family is settling in for the night? its loud, people are asking you questions, the kitchen is already a mess and you’re trying to keep track of the things you still need to do tonight while setting up your to-do list for tomorrow to include any of today’s overflow and how to prioritize the most important things on that list? Feel like your heart is going a million miles and hour and it might rupture because you’re not actually a racehorse? Now I can breathe a few times, focus on the crunch of carrots when I chop them, feel the weight of the knife in my hand, smell the rosemary in the pan and remind myself that I am making dinner right now, and that makes dinner the most important thing on my to-do list. And therefore I can focus my attention on the moment and what I’m doing instead of everything I need to do or haven’t done. 

Does it work every time? No. That’s why it is called practicing meditation. But it has greatly bolstered my ability to regulate myself instead of needing somebody else to help me do that. 

Additionally, Meditation has also been show to decrease stress, promote emotional health, lengthen your attention span, reduce age related memory loss, help fight addiction, increase sleep health, control pain, and decrease blood pressure. 

It slowly and gently teaches you to be more aware and more open in the present moment. I do feel less ambiently anxious and less rushed. And when I do still feel overwhelmed, I have something at my fingertips that can take the edge off. 

The practice of being mindful is not a new concept. It has been integrated in the Hindu religion for millennia. The concept of “mindfulness” traces to the Pali words sati, which in the Indian Buddhist tradition implies awareness, attention, or alertness, and vipassana, which means insight cultivated by meditation. It didn’t truly migrate and gain popularity in the United States until the 1960’s with its more medical approach being introduced by John Kabat-Zinn in 1979 when he started his Stress Reduction Center at the University of Massachusetts Medical School. 

There are a number of different styles of mindfulness and meditation, but the overall concept is the same. The hardest part for me, of beginning to practice and find out more about the mindfulness concept was getting out of my own head, and being unafraid to ask questions and meet new people; something I don’t always excel at. As well as finding information that resonated with me.  

There is SO MUCH information out there which is both a pro and a con. You don’t have to look very far, but the sheer amount of resources can be overwhelming for someone who is unsure where to start.  

If you are interested in starting your own journey, below are some of my favorite resources- from books to do some more learning to audio programs with guided meditations for beginners. I hope that this helps make the journey a little less daunting.  

1. An Invitation to Meditation by Howard Cohn. This is a VERY short easy read. Bordering on Poetry. This really helped me breakdown that feeling of unattainability surrounding meditation. I had the opportunity to meet him at a Meditation event in Phoenix and it was him that sat down with me and answered some questions and helped me work through the struggles of focusing ON my body instead of ignoring it. He gave me the copy of the short book as a gift.  
2. Mindfulness Minutes on the Fitbit Premium App. There are sooooo many different meditation apps out there on the market. I am partial to this one because it syncs with the rest of my fit bit, and I find it fascinating that I can see the correlation between my heart rate and my meditation sessions after the fact. Additionally the library has hundreds of different length and topic meditations for those just figuring it out. anywhere from 20 minute longer sessions to 2 minutes breathing exercising. Cooking meditations, shower meditations, focus meditations. Great for somebody like me who really needs that guided portion because your attention span is shorter than that squirrel from ‘Over the Hedge’. 
3. The waking up app. This one is something my Fiancé uses more than I, but I’ve listened to a lot of them. The bonus to this particular app is it was written and designed by Sam Harris who is a Noted Philosopher, Neuroscientist, & Author. You will notice that his name appears multiple times on this list. This App also includes a number of vintage recordings by Alan Watts, those are worth the membership themselves. The talks are fascinating and I could listen to the man speak for hours.  
4. Waking up by Sam Harris. The book of the same name by Sam Harris is another amazing resource for those of you who prefer to read and be able to make notes in margins, save/ highlight things.  
5. John Kabat-Zinn’s Masterclass on Mindfulness. This was an amazing experience, straight from one of the leading experts themselves. Broken up into small bites sized pieces. He has over 40 years of teaching experience and is basically the father of the Medically applied concept. He is an expert at saying things in simple layman’s terms that are easy to understand and digest.  

If you are just starting your journey, I’d love to hear if any of these help you as much as they do me. If you’ve been practicing for a bit, I’d love it if you’d chime in with any other resources that have been incredibly helpful to you. the art of intentionality and mindfulness has so many applications and uses. If nothing else I think it helps make us more self-aware and as a result, kinder, better people with more compassion for ourselves and others. It can be hard to stay in the moment. It can be hard to find inner peace with everything going on in the larger world and around us. This has helped me find peace in a lot of ways. What would having the ability to flip a switch and find peace do for you? What would that inner calm help you do during your day? 

See you on the journey!  

With love, 

Mikaela